Ok, maybe I don't like it, but I am ok with it. I am at least comfortable with the idea of being uncomfortable.
I am grateful for some recent uncomfortable experiences that have grown me - a relationship that taught me to be vulnerable, soft, and caring; a breakup that taught me to recover and reprioritize; and the hindsight to see "what didn't work" as "what will work in the future."
When Chris and I broke up, he said something powerful: "You know, you'll have this again, Kat. It's always a similar plotline, just with different characters. You'll still have all those wonderful things that you dream about, just with somebody who dreams about them too."
And much as I didn't want him to be right or charming or pure about one damn thing he said to me that day, the truth is, he was all of the above!
You see, Chris was already in love when I met him. He was in love with a particular future - with Chicago, living amongst tall buildings in a big city, having a few biological kids of his own, working long consultant hours, traveling all over, and enjoying a fast-paced weekend of drinking and running and socializing.
I was already in love with a different future - with my Birmingham suburb, my dog, and a dynasty of foster children, workdays spent doing something that matters but coming home at a reasonable hour to the people that matter even more, and weekends spent sleeping in, taking walks, watching Blaine's baseball games, and grabbing coffee with friends.
We both have exciting adventures ahead - just vastly different adventures, that don't overlap, that we can't take together. I am grateful that he was able to see this; it would have taken me a lot longer.
I am thankful for the experience, and the possibilities...
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